A Bean Eulogy: Dropping the Coffee Habit Like it's Hot
As part of retreat month this month, I have caught up on all of those niggling life details that often slide into last place. Dentist, doctor are two such details. Yesterday, this was the scene at the dentist's office.
"I have some news I don't know how to break to you," said the dental hygienist. We were both squatting down looking at the x-rays of my teeth. This mouth of mine? It's worth well over four thousand dollars thanks to six extractions and braces to correct a thirteen milimeter overbite in my teens. My orthodontist confessed to me a decade after I got the braces off that she uses my x-rays at orthodontist industry conferences to show the power of braces. Mine remains one of the worst overbites she has ever corrected. (My grandmother asked her flat out if I could get a kickback.)
But back in the dentist's office, we're on the floor, looking up. She's pointing at my gumline. "You have very healthy teeth and gums, but...you do have one...small...cavity." The word ping ponged in the front of my mind. My eyes welled up with tears, I'm not going to lie to you. I had to kick myself mentally by thinking, "babies, dying, orphanages, starvation..." but it sucked. My first cavity. It was like I had straight A's in Teeth and had just scored my first minus. She saw my reaction. Said, "no one ever has to know. You can still say you have never had a cavity! You won't even be able to see the filling - it'll be the same color as your tooth." I don't even know how I could lie to you.
We talked for a few minutes about how this happened. (How could this happen!?) I'm a flosser and a twice-a-day brusher. She said (as if in slow motion) that when you drink coffee throughout the day the acids (yes, she said acids) sit on your teeth and even if you floss, the damage is already done.
A cavity! My first, and last, I said to her: "I'm quitting coffee." She didn't flinch. She said "ok, and the doctor will be right in to give you a final once-over."
Later that day I announced it on Twitter. I asked for a bit of support from my online friends. I got some support. And I unsurprisingly got a fair bit of skepticism.
My friend Chris said, "that sounds like a pretty bad day to me" and he was right. But giving up the coffee wasn't what made it a bad day. My favorite Boulder coffee shop said, "What??? Why.....?" to which Ryan responded, "I'll drink [her] espresso." It made me laugh but didn't test my resolve. The decision is a firm one.
I've noticed my heart rate on coffee. You have too, I'm sure. Even though it's comforting to have a warm cup of something in my hands, it's not comforting to crash once a day. It's so clear to me it's a drug. One time, talking with a barista, he said he sometimes feels like a pusher. He goes to a bar at night and sees his coffee shop customers there. They're drinking alcohol to "calm down" after a busy day. But he knows that the reason they need to unwind is that they've been jacked on caffeine. He sometimes thinks about what would happen if he told someone "no" when they come back for a fourth refill during.
I've been a barista, and I know exactly what he's talking about. If I don't know how to handle a problem I often think I'll take a coffee break. That'll fix everything.
Christine Bougie sent me an encouraging email after I made my commitment public. She said, "My quick advice - don't think about taking away coffee. Think about adding water (or green drinks or whatever can be a healthy morning ritual drink)." So I'm adding a new ritual to my life. An antioxidant-rich ritual (without the side effects - and yes, I've heard every argument about why coffee is not really that bad for you. I've been the one sending those studies around for years justifying my habit.) And I'm not ready to give up caffeine altogether but I'm not replacing coffee with ten cups of green tea, either.
I'm also not ready to give up cafe culture altogether. It has been a mainstay for me for many years. And obviously holds a warm place in my heart. But next time I order it's going to be chai, straight. Not dirty.
Good-bye, coffee habit.
Can't say you'll be missed, but you were great while you lasted.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Reader Comments (36)
What?! And I just started on coffee for you. WHAT?!
(Just kidding. I didn't start on coffee for you. But I WOULD HAVE.)
Kudos for deciding what's more important in your life. I'm a sometimes-coffee-drinker. Just like I'm a sometimes-grownup-kind-of-drinker. I just don't like to be addicted to stuff. And yay for getting that cavity filled and pretending it never happened. I'll definitely support you on that. LOL
I just gave up cigarettes a month ago (good for the gum health!), but I cannot imagine giving up my beloved coffee. This bit of news about it causing cavities is alarming. Poo.
Sarah I love you to bits. Thank you for always bringing joy with you wherever you go. Really, just move here, ok?
Schmutzie Rock. That's great to hear and I support you from over here. Where it's snowing. And I kind of want a cup of something warm.
Good for you! I've given up coffee repeatedly (mostly because I have acid reflux), but I always fall off the wagon eventually. Sending you (and myself) good quitting vibes!
I had no idea that coffee caused acid to sit on your teeth! WOW! That would explain a lot about my own cavity issues this year. I've had 4 cavities (plus all the fillings) and realized my coffee / cookie habits have become expensive. ):
I've tossed around the idea of giving up coffee for a while. But haven't been able to follow through. I know I'm addicted to the stuff, but it tastes so good. I'll have to make a pro/con list tonight. I'm so impressed! You go girl! :)
Average Jane I support you in your path towards quitting. It feels so good to know there are others working really hard to give something up that once brought comfort. I think, bottomlining it with myself, it's about long-term happiness and well-being. Short-term, I love chai and tea, too. And I am not trying to quit alcohol (yet). So, that helps.
Tammy Good luck. Let us know what you decide!
Good for you. I gave up coffee for a month long cleanse, about six months ago, and haven't gone back. I actually went off all caffeine and after about five days I began to feel calmer, as though everything in the world had just slowed down a little. In fact it was me who had slowed down a little and I liked it that way. I drink Rooibos (Red Bush) tea now and have found some delicious rooibos chai that I love. I've also figured out which of the cafes in Wellington serve rooibos teas and steer my friends in their direction when it is time for a "coffee" date. No more rapid heartbeats, no more afternoon crashes, better sleep and brighter mornings. It's been all good. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
Marianne I love to hear this! And I'm a huge Rooibus drinker, too. Just found an Earl Grey Rooibus that I love. It's like Earl Grey...but better for you. Delicious. (Rishi Tea, in case you want to give it a try. I found it at Whole Foods, fwiw.)
I quit coffee (though I still sneak in decaf lattes here and there) about 3 years ago. I used to give up coffee once a year as a part of a juice cleanse and always found that the giving up coffee part was far harder than the going without food part. Finally that sunk in and I was able to figure out that coffee and my body didn't get along so well. I do occasionally drink green tea, which I find much milder/easier on my body and far less addictive. Not sure what the dental ramifications are though. I did try a full caf-coffee last Fall while visiting a friend in Santa Monica. It tasted divine and I loved every minute of it. Then about an hour later I found myself, without a care in the world, bike riding along the boardwalk and suddenly in the throws of a major anxiety attack. It took me a few minutes to draw the line between the coffee and the totally uncalled for anxiety, but since then I've been pretty convinced that I'll never go back.
Good on you for giving it up. If nothing else, it's always interesting to see what shifts in our habits bring.
Go, Gwen! Over the summer I switched from regular to decaf as a nice way to wean myself off the coffee habit. I had a splitting headache for TWO DAYS! It was so painful. I swore I would never do that to myself again. It is definitely a drug!! Now, to back off the decaf habit, too. I'm working on it. It's more the ritual of going out for the coffee and holding something warm. But there are many other options...sometimes, I can manage with hot water, honey and lemon. Good luck :)
I just gave up coffee a few weeks ago. I just weaned myself off of it. I liked to think I was only having "two cups a day", but they're 16-oz cups! So I started the process by not finishing the second mug, and each day leaving a little bit more behind, until I wasn't pouring the second mug. I'd hold that til the next morning, and nuke it. After a week of one mug each morning, I started changing the formula. I'd been using three scoops to make the two mugs, so I subbed one of the scoops with decaf. After two days of that, I went to one scoop of high-test and two scoops of unleaded. After two days of that, I stopped making it altogether, timing it so it happened on a Saturday in case I got headaches, but none appeared.
So now I begin the day with a tall glass of V8 juice, followed by a tall glass of low-cal cranberry-pomegranate juice. So far so good.
Good luck getting decaffeinated!
--Ax
Good on ya-
Cutting coffee is never gonna hurt..........."Caffeine Blues" by stephen Cherniskie is a good book you'll want to read if you want a million other reaons. Theres a used copy at the boulder bookstore-
Tea is good, and lots of variety. Moroccan mint is my perpetual favorite.
OK, wait, your FIRST cavity?? You really should read this http://popdiscourse.com/2009/05/the-scarlet-letter-of-oral-hygiene/ then give yourself 12 huge pats on the back from my direction.
OK, second, good for you! I actually quit coffee about 6 weeks ago. It was weirdly easy to do (maybe because my crazy ex- was the one who got me started on it...). I had a latte in Utah at breakfast as a treat and weirdly, I didn't feel sucked back into it. Back home, on my usual tea routine, I'm perfectly happy.
I get the social fun around coffee but honestly I don't miss that feeling of reaching for it out of habit or gravitating to it out of mild addiction. If I'm going to enjoy the occasional cup, I want to do it in a mindful space, as in Utah. -Christine
Christine That story broke my heart! I think snackers are more prone to cavities, too. Especially if that snack is healthy and fruity!
Gwen - Good for you! Breaking habits is very hard to do. I have never been a coffee drinker. My caffeinated "vice" was/is soda. Particularly Coke. And not the diet variety. I gave up carbonated beverages once in college and my acne actually cleared up. I replaced the soda with iced tea and water and survived the caffeine withdrawls quite easily.
Then, during an illness, my doctor recommended 7-Up as I recovered and I went back wholeheartedly. Then, about 2 years ago, after many years of not worrying and watching the weight pile on, I decided to curtail my liter-plus Coke-a-day habit. I decided to let myself enjoy a glass or two at most, once a week. After 6 months I found I had dropped about 5-10 pounds! Needless to say, this was quite encouraging. I still manage no more than 1-2 a week. I can say that this has helped me keep the weight off that I lost since those first six months when I began a walking/Wii Fit/dieting regimen which saw another 47 pound reduction.
So, I applaud you for resolving to break the habit.
I support you!
In your transition to tea, be sure to look at both the acid levels (I've no idea) and also the tannin levels. Green tea is less likely to stain your teeth than black, but white tea is even LESS likely.
Also, you may consider chickory for that cuppa-something-warm. I've found it in a jar near the instant coffees, but unlike most instant coffee, it's really delicious.
All the best in your efforts at dental excellence!
Sorry, this isn't a double post. Editing my post via iPhone.
Just wanted to add: Dont be afraid to have a cup, now and again. Or, as I did, tell yourself you are not "giving it up", but rather, "cutting back". But, based on what little I have seen, reading your posts, Twitter, etc. I am confident you'll not look back.
Lastly, I wish you the very best with your decision. Don't let any naysayers get ya down!!
Peace,
Les
Les thank you for sharing your story. I encourage you in your continued efforts to break the habit, too! It's interesting to hear a doc prescribe 7-Up! but I'm sure it did the trick. Good idea to think of it as "cutting back" - I guess my fear is I'll "cut back" for a while and then pick it up again. My desire to live cavity-free is stronger than my desire for another cup. I just have to harness this energy and remind myself of it next time I want a cup. As I'm sure that moment will arise.
TCAbeen Never ever knew that instant chicory is tasty. Thanks for the tip!
Good luck! I recently had to give up both caffeine and (*gasp*) sugar to address some health challenges.
It's been rough, but slowly energy levels balance out, cravings diminish, and peace settles in. We humans can adapt to anything.
Gwen, thank you for the quick reply and encouragement.
I will add that because I didn't quit cold turkey, my mind didn't seem to crave the soda as much. Just knowing that it was "ok" to have one now and again made it easy to keep asking for water or tea. And, here in the south you have to specify "unsweet" tea or you get brown colored sugar sludge with a faint hint of tea. ;-) (I'm a California transplant so I didn't grow up on sweet tea.)
As for the 7-Up prescription, I was recovering from Mono and an allergic reaction to penicillin and I recall he wanted me on clear fluids and I had had my fill of water. ;-)
So, just go with what works but don't beat yourself up if you have a cup. Even 2-3 a month won't do so bad now that you know the consequences. It's the 2-3 a day that does it if I were to guess. Just don't quote me on that! I'm not a dentist and I didn't sleep at a Holiday Inn Express last night. Ha!
Peace, Les
I thoroughly enjoy my 2 shots of espresso with a little foam every morning. Moderation in all things is the answer! I can quit in an instant, but why would I?
I've apparently hit the jackpot on the bad teeth lottery.. I've got a terrible overbite, four broken teeth, and five cavities. I just recently quit sugar and i don't eat hardly any sweets, i haven't seen chocolate in a very long time. Now i drink tea with honey only and i only drink soda once or twice a month.
My poor teeth are going to cost me around $8,000 or so to fix. But at least when i'm done i'll never get another cavity.
P.S. Just to point out.. i broke my teeth on scalding hot soup.. Guess that teaches you to let things cool down! My whole mouth was burned for a few days it was awful. So the only thing i have to blame on sugar is for the cavities.. The rest was just genetic cruelty... :-)
I hope you post on how it goes for you! I feel like coffee is my crack. (No, I haven't tried crack but you get my point.) I agree, it's obviously a drug -- and I hate that headache if I don't have it in the morning!
Good luck!
Melissa
Not only is coffee that bad for your teeth, but the tea will clean your teeth for you. It has a little flouride and it is also antibacterial and antimicrobial so it will cleanse away the germs that cause bad breath as well as that which causes plaque and tooth decay. My dentist raves about my teeth now that I swish tea around in my mouth after eating. It's a natural mouthwash and you get to have tea while doing it. --Teaternity