There are two ways to approach the social web. With an empty cup. And with a full cup.

The empty cup is a laptop opened with anticipation to learn.

The full cup knows all there is to know before opening the laptop.

With an empty cup, you're ready to discover. You're willing to see your blog with fresh eyes. You're willing to listen to a new perspective on what you're currently doing. A full cup is best illustrated by this well-known Zen story:

A university professor went to visit a famous Zen master. While the master quietly served tea, the professor talked about Zen. The master poured the visitor's cup to the brim, and then kept pouring. The professor watched the overflowing cup until he could no longer restrain himself. "It's overfull! No more will go in!" the professor blurted. "You are like this cup," the master replied, "How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup."

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The following is a session I had with a client last year. We had thirty minutes.

That doesn't sound like a lot of time. It's more than enough if a client/student is ready with an empty cup.

I should point out that every consulting session looks different and depends on the goals and needs of the client. I know that might be pretty self-evident, but just want to be clear. In the session, I'm "GB," the client is "LC, Linda Cardillo" and if it's in brackets I've altered it but none of the important information is missing. This is a portion of our conversation.

GB How's the blog going?

LC From the writing end, great. I'm in a rhythm and disciplined about posting. No comments yet. Started about two weeks ago, and sent a newsletter to my list

GB What are your goals for the blog?

LC I'd like to use it for a number of things--as a resource to writers, as a glimpse into my upcoming books; and as a way for people who know me to know me better and share me with their friends

GB Right now, in what way do you think your blog is serving your readers? For instance, if all [ number of readers on mailing list ] showed up today to read, what would you want them to leave feeling/thinking/saying?

LC That they've learned something about creativity, that they've been entertained, that they've been inspired to do something for themselves that enriches their lives. I think I also want them to feel enriched by what they read--a connection, a recipe, a memory.

GB Ok, so what I'm seeing right now is a lot of recipes. If I came to your site blindly - someone pointed me to it - I'd think it was a cooking blog, rather than a writing blog. Have you considered giving your readers a weekly writing prompt or challenge?

LC No, but I like that idea. The main reason there are so many recipes right now was because of [the holidays]. Also, I've decided to structure the posts so that one day a week I write about food.

GB Even asking, at the end of a post, what's your favorite recipe? What do you like to eat at the holidays? What are your comfort foods? Right now the blog is focused more on your own recipes/loves. Which is fine. A blog has to be two-way if you want to start seeing comments/links back to your blog.

Could you create a posting schedule that you announce to readers - Check in Wednesday for a new recipe from my upcoming book! Or: Check in each Monday for a writing prompt to get you writing! That can really help build loyalty, trust and readership

LC That's what I was thinking. I put it in the newsletter and it's buried in one of the posts last week. Is there a way to highlight the message so it's always on the site?

GB You can put it in your about box. Your about box doesn't necessarily need to be about you - it can be about the blog

LC I like that.

GB You can personalize it as you desire. Your content is great - and it's abundant. I think that simply turning the focus outward some will invite your readers into the conversation

LC I'm also trying to dispel the stereotypes about [ ].

GB Ahh, interesting. You can put that into your mission for the blog

LC Yes!

GB Using photos & descriptive titles is great - maybe try to ask a question _in_ the title

GB For instance: instead of "Thanksgiving Reflections," ask, "What are you reflecting on this Thanksgiving?"

LC These are all solid ideas I can use right away. I have discovered that I really like writing the blog--just wish that I knew someone was reading it!

GB Another thing to consider is a blogroll - link to other blogs Link to blogs you love to read - they will drop by usually if you say nice things about them

LC So that's how it happens....

GB Well, it doesn't have to be nice - it just takes one link sometimes ...to get the ball rolling

LC That's how I found you! ... At first, I thought it would be exhausting to keep up the pace that [another blogger] does, but, as I said, I'm really having fun.

GB That's the point of all this - sometimes folks forget

LC By the way, I loved your Yoga book. I took to heart your comment near the end about one's brand being what people said after one leaves the room. The very next day I got an email from a reader who defined me. I'm glad we had the chance to chat also. Thanks so much!

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One final note. The focus here has been on the willingness of the student. There's an equally important role.

The consultant/teacher has to approach the client/student fresh. She has to be willing to meet the student where he's at right now. When we feel impatient with the student our cup as teachers is full (and of course, we all have our off days). When we can meet a student where she's at today - magic.

It's one of the reasons I shy away from the word "expert" in any space. The moment we see ourselves as expert is the moment we stop powering on with a question. Instead, we power on thinking we have the answers. I want to be a learner for life - and to help from that place of wanting to learn.

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I sent this post to Linda before posting and she said, "I love the 'empty cup' metaphor.  I definitely felt that our session filled me with new ideas.  Finding you has truly made a difference in what I'm doing and how I think about it."

It's an honor to have worked with you, Linda. Thanks for the willingness to share your story.